I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
