So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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