i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
