well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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