let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Randomize