your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
i was born a porn star she said
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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