I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Randomize
