i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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