do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
