just tell him i said nine months
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
