some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
