turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Randomize
