when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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