well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize