Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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