And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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