what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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