She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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