We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Randomize
