We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Randomize