What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
