make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
