Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
