But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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