I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
