Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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