I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
