If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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