i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
