it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
