well you can't waste a boner
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
