Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
