Did you just see the Batmobile???
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
