I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize