We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
