do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I just forgot I was standing up.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
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