Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
