Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
