I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
