I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
