At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
