Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize