shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
