Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
