it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
