You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize