watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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