Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Sober January is a disaster.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
