She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
smell my finger.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize