From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
